Grief and Love
Life comes with surprises and with very few guarantees. There is one guarantee, however, that each person can count on. Death will happen to each of us and to our loved ones. In these instances, grief is inevitable. Some people choose to ignore the grieving process, but it will just be buried, it does not actually go away. There are ways to manage grief, before and after a person passes away.
How to manage grief before death:
One of the simplest regrets that occur after someone has passed away is that people wish that forgiveness had taken place, and that there was more time to fix the broken relationships. There is time to forgive or reconnect, and that is now. Two important pieces of advice for this situation is from Matthew 5:25 and Luke 6:37.
25 “Settle matters quickly with your adversary who is taking you to court. Do it while you are still together on the way, or your adversary may hand you over to the judge, and the judge may hand you over to the officer, and you may be thrown into prison. 26 Truly I tell you, you will not get out until you have paid the last penny.
Matthew 5:25
37 “Do not judge, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn, and you will not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven.
Luke 6:37
In the verse from Matthew 5:25, we can see the importance of handling disagreements. Our final judge is the Lord. If we bring harm to someone, we must repent and request their forgiveness because we are at fault. However, in the verse from Luke 6:37, we may be at fault if we refuse to forgive others who try to make peace with us. Even in our hurt that another person caused, they are not the ones harmed by unforgiveness.
Knowing that not a single person on this Earth will last forever, take the time now to request forgiveness or to forgive. Forgiving someone does not mean that you are inviting them back into your life. Forgiving someone is acknowledging that the person messed up, praying for them, and moving on.
How to manage grief after death:
There is not a get healed quick scheme when it comes to the passing of a loved one. Remembering that the person is no longer in pain only helps so much. The Bible prepared us for the death of loved ones in John 11 when Lazarus died. One of the most touching verses in this chapter is verse 35.
35 Jesus wept.
John 11:35
Jesus knew that Lazarus was going to be fine. The emotion is still there even though we know our loved ones are going to see Jesus. We do not cry for them; we cry for us. We cry for the things we will not get to experience together, for the love that is in our hearts that we can no longer tell them of, and for the pain of those around us who are also suffering in this moment. Do not hold back your tears.
Another significant moment regarding death is the story of who is the husband among the seven brothers who shared a wife in Matthew 22.
29 Jesus replied, “You are in error because you do not know the Scriptures or the power of God. 30 At the resurrection people will neither marry nor be given in marriage; they will be like the angels in heaven. 31 But about the resurrection of the dead—have you not read what God said to you, 32 ‘I am the God of Abraham, the God of Isaac, and the God of Jacob? He is not the God of the dead but of the living.”
Matthew 22:29-32.
God is not the God of the dead. We may see our loved one as dead, but are they really? This is why it is vital that we share the gospel among everyone, including our loved ones. We need to ensure that they are saved. God tells us to write His words on our hearts, so we do not lose sight of them when we need them. One verse that sums up the love of God is John 3:16.
16 For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.
John 3:16
John 3:16 is a gift of peace to us, not only because Jesus saved us, but when the time is here when all we see if the grief before us, that this verse will hold us firm in hope. Hope that this moment is not truly the end, but only the beginning for them.
As always, God loves you, I love you, and I will be praying for you.